is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
