So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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