So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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