First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Randomize
