I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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