The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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