you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
