This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
