I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
