yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
