you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
