well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
