After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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