Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
