omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize