please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
