i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
