Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
