I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
