i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
