I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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