I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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