Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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