He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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