my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
