I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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