The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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