the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
