Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
