we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
