I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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