i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
