I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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