Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
4 words: hood of his car
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Randomize
