I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
