think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
