with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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