So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize
