Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
