Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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