yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
