omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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