thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
