I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
