i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
