Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Your mouth is God's brothel.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
