Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
