My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Randomize
