he thought i was a dude.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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