i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
